YIPPEE!

So, I finished!
and I made my time. 3:28:39 by my watch, havent seen the official score yet.

It was fine.
Yesterday i was regretting having done it. but tonight, it feels good to hurt. For once everyone i talked to was impressed. Never the point, but a nice bonus.

So I made my time goal. That means that in the seven weeks I trained, I went from a 3:47:54 to a 3:28:39. Pretty cool. It also means I get a tattoo if I want, and I sign up for a half ironman if I want.


if I want.

Right now its 11:41 at night and I can't really sleep. my stomach hurts, and I slept technically most of the day today. What a better time to think than at night. What better time to decide about the next race than while youre still sore from the last. Thats when you get the most accurate determination of where you're really willing to take this whole thing.

I've not gotten to the limit.
There is a limit. Dispite what athletes think while they're training, "I can be faster, I can be stronger, I can be better" (the elite ones are paid to think that) There is a limit. There is a point at which you are as strong, as lean, as fast, as fluid as you'll ever get. Time, age, joint degeneration, everything is rooting against you at a certain point. I think most of us rarely get there. In fact, I think only the most celebrated of athletes ever get there. but just like hollywood, they get there because they can pay people to help them. For those of us without that kind of money, maybe the limit is sooner. But at any rate, Anytime I do an extended distance race, I think at some point that I've reached my limit. But I never have. I've never gotten to the point where I've felt like training has REALLY made a difference. I've never gotten to the point where my life changes as a result of training. I've never reached the place where I feel like I'm there. That I've arrived. I dont think many people ever do. I think thats the place you reach only in hind-sight.

But I'd like to think I've made it someday. That I'm as lean, strong, healthy, fast, and fluid as I'm going to be. Hopefully this is NOT it.

Anyway...that's a backassward way of getting to the point.
What I did feel this weekend...and more specifically tonight, as I can get up from the couch without grunting again...is a lot of potential. Potential that I really could do a half ironman. Holy crap. I almost don't believe that I can type it with a straight face. holy crap is it big.
Don't think I don't respect it.
Don't think I don't know it could own me today.
Don't think I don't know how terribly inconsistant I am.

And don't think I've made the decision yet, I still have about 30 days to think about it.
But tonight, as I go to sleep, when the rest of my world is upside down in indecision and misdirection, and I don't know WHERE I'll be when the day itself gets here, its nice to think that there is something I can choose. Seriously, maybe I'll get started on training, hurt myself and the dream will be out the door, but, I do know that if I had to make the decision tonight, that I would sign up for the HIM in November.

we'll see where I end up in 30 days.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

listless

I'm not sure what is going on in my head, but i'm very uninspired lately. i feel like there is so much more I should be doing, but its like i'm watching life from through a window. like i have no real impact on the story, i just sit and watch it unfold and hope the story starts getting adventurous. I'm chosing to call it uninspired because that still leaves the door open for me to have some kind of impact. Like if i could just muster up some passion for something I would be able to find some great purpose and meaning in what I'm doing. I'm thinking about all the kids going back to school and the college students heading off for a new year, and I'm finding that I'm jealous. My life doesnt cycle like that anymore. There is no rise and fall with the seasons. There is no connection to the calendar. Everyday bleeds by in the same numbing pattern. My clothes barely even change with seasons anymore. everyday finds itself looking exactly like the last: wake up l...
Read more

whats your self worth?

People have said, something is only worth what someone would pay for it. If what you're selling, no one is buying, then what you have is pretty worthless. But there are stores out there that sell all kinds of things and so the market makes room for them. People are the same. Some people are beautiful, but useless for more than their looks. Like a painting they are worth a lot because people see them as rare.But, some people can go their whole lives without decorating. Some people are useful and so are worth a lot because they fulfill some purpose. Hardworking, or smart, they are seen has having some value that makes them worth the investment. Then there are people I'd characterize as novelty people. You buy them because you've just never seen anything like them. They're especially entertaing or unique. They don't cost a lot, so you can't pass them up. Then there are bargain people. They don't cost much, arent worth much and don't last long. They fill a s...
Read more

Musical Unity: A response to Michael Gungor

When I first started listening to Contemporary Christian Music (CCM) the only people around were Amy Grant and Michael W Smith. Maybe Kathy Tricolli and Sandi Patty...Any maybe Carmen, but why mention Carmen? Shortly before I started listening to CCM there was no such thing as CCM. The 80s were just about a barren wasteland for Christian entertainment. We had a handle on good old Gospel and regular people started writing worship music. My life wouldn't be the same without Keith Green. But then came the 90s. WHAT an AMAZING time!! Right? DC talk, Audio Adrenaline, Newsboys, OC Supertones...Holy Music COW! If you were a young Christian, you could turn your radio up proudly and still feel cool. It was EPIC. From 15-21 I didn't listen to much other than CCM. Only the cool CCM of course. The stuff that the local Christian radio station only played on Friday Nights. Then I hit 21 and was, practically overnight, too cool for CCM. I bought a soapbox on top of which I declared ...
Read more