here we go

I've been brewing quietly inside for the last month. I'm terribly unhappy in this body from the paths I've lead it down. But the paths were my choices and I have to unhike them. I've been taking the easy way for the last couple of years. Hiking downhill for miles. And now I have to get back up where I was before. 
On day four of a six week couch to 5k plan. It took me two months to get through the first week. 
Went to the Savannah half marathon this past weekend. Didn't run it. The pain of missing out struck me. It was something else to know I was registered for a race and I didn't complete it. But still going and watching all of the people who did go was tough. But it was good. 
Today I ran. Today I feel ok. Today I am as fat as I was yesterday but I ran. Tomorrow I'll walk. And I will just keep going. One foot in front of the other. 
If I want to feel the Joy of the victory that is crossing that finish line next year, I have to feel the three hundred smaller victories between here and there. I have to work hard. 

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