What a world.
I am so tired.
I haven't blogged on this page for two years. Ish. If you are a follower you get the joy of knowing that I'm posting again. But I won't be broadcasting entries. I'm so tired of thinking about marketing and accessibility and SEO. God.
I've come back here because it's a lovely isolated echo chamber and no one really listens to my echo. It's nice to read back on the bullshit I used to think and see how I've grown and nice to flex my philosophical muscles on shit that has no consequence where I literally don't care who I offend.
ahhh.
I missed you blog.
I changed the name too, did you see that? It used to be jiggsintransition when i was training for triathlons and that was cute, but now it just sounds like i'm transgender. While I love and support anyone who wants to transition, I get sir'd enough in real life and don't need help with gender confusion. So now it's called Shpeek. It's a nonsense word that my wife helped me come up with. It doesn't mean shit, so don't try and make it.
Back to the point. I am so tired. Literally. Emotional exhaustion from living in Trumps america...and no its not just Trump that is exhausting it's anti-Trump bullshit too. I say it because I feel the anti-trump bullshit. Everyone is so desperately off their damn rocker. Some of my friends post nonstop liberal memes and I just want to argue with them because they are fantastical nonsense. Other friends post nonstop conservative memes and I just want to pull my hair out and scream to these people that they are both being complete and total assholes.
But now when i listen i listen as a couples therapist. Do you know how brain-frying it is to listen to conflict after a day of negotiating conflict? The bitterness and hatred coming from the far right and the far left is worse than anything i have heard from a scorned or battered spouse. We are so contemptuous. how do we ever think we are going to solve a problem in our nation and world if we spend so much energy trying to piss on each other's faces?? If you are extreme, you just plain and simply aren't correct. Nothing extreme is the answer.
And no one can even see how extreme they are being.
But other people are not my problem. My problem is that I am tired.
I dont know what happened to me and my body between 35 and 40 but its messed up. This week coming I am having gallbladder surgery. My GB is all messed up. I dont even know how much it has been affecting, but i guess we'll find out.
My gb is why I'm back here. Sometimes people read this blog but usually they didnt. it was mostly me putting something out there and thinking people were reading it. Regardless, it was a place to make commitments to myself and try and change. Change is what I really need. I have so many great things happening in my life now. I have a wonderful wife, adorable puppies and a fantastic job.
But i have lost touch with me. All the noise and distractions have robbed me of a deep and meaningful relationship with myself. While this place is nice and all and I'm sure on its way to hell in a handbasket, I am the only part of this universe i have any real power over. And despite all the discomfort that the outside world inflicts on me, I willingly walk into it. I willingly scroll and read and argue and feed off of what this world and specifically this country thinks matters.
but how can a world and country so backward have any idea what really matters?
I haven't blogged on this page for two years. Ish. If you are a follower you get the joy of knowing that I'm posting again. But I won't be broadcasting entries. I'm so tired of thinking about marketing and accessibility and SEO. God.
I've come back here because it's a lovely isolated echo chamber and no one really listens to my echo. It's nice to read back on the bullshit I used to think and see how I've grown and nice to flex my philosophical muscles on shit that has no consequence where I literally don't care who I offend.
ahhh.
I missed you blog.
I changed the name too, did you see that? It used to be jiggsintransition when i was training for triathlons and that was cute, but now it just sounds like i'm transgender. While I love and support anyone who wants to transition, I get sir'd enough in real life and don't need help with gender confusion. So now it's called Shpeek. It's a nonsense word that my wife helped me come up with. It doesn't mean shit, so don't try and make it.
Back to the point. I am so tired. Literally. Emotional exhaustion from living in Trumps america...and no its not just Trump that is exhausting it's anti-Trump bullshit too. I say it because I feel the anti-trump bullshit. Everyone is so desperately off their damn rocker. Some of my friends post nonstop liberal memes and I just want to argue with them because they are fantastical nonsense. Other friends post nonstop conservative memes and I just want to pull my hair out and scream to these people that they are both being complete and total assholes.
But now when i listen i listen as a couples therapist. Do you know how brain-frying it is to listen to conflict after a day of negotiating conflict? The bitterness and hatred coming from the far right and the far left is worse than anything i have heard from a scorned or battered spouse. We are so contemptuous. how do we ever think we are going to solve a problem in our nation and world if we spend so much energy trying to piss on each other's faces?? If you are extreme, you just plain and simply aren't correct. Nothing extreme is the answer.
And no one can even see how extreme they are being.
But other people are not my problem. My problem is that I am tired.
I dont know what happened to me and my body between 35 and 40 but its messed up. This week coming I am having gallbladder surgery. My GB is all messed up. I dont even know how much it has been affecting, but i guess we'll find out.
My gb is why I'm back here. Sometimes people read this blog but usually they didnt. it was mostly me putting something out there and thinking people were reading it. Regardless, it was a place to make commitments to myself and try and change. Change is what I really need. I have so many great things happening in my life now. I have a wonderful wife, adorable puppies and a fantastic job.
But i have lost touch with me. All the noise and distractions have robbed me of a deep and meaningful relationship with myself. While this place is nice and all and I'm sure on its way to hell in a handbasket, I am the only part of this universe i have any real power over. And despite all the discomfort that the outside world inflicts on me, I willingly walk into it. I willingly scroll and read and argue and feed off of what this world and specifically this country thinks matters.
but how can a world and country so backward have any idea what really matters?
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