Great Expectations
I went to a conference on Monday night about prayer and hearing the voice of God. While my friend sat right next to me and heard what the speaker was saying, and said she heard a lot of hope in her words, I cynically observed and got nothing but crabby about it.
Her talk centered around all of the ways God has used prayer in her life: things that she has prayed for that God did.
I think i ridiculed it because she gave the impression that her life was full and perfect and couldnt get any better. And that ticked me off.
I come from the school of Derek Webbs who combat people's urge to treat God like a vending machine. He's not here for me, I am here for HIM. He created me for himself, not the other way around. Constantly begging him for blessings and wonderful things is corrupt.
Right?
I've been wrestling with it since Monday.
Because no matter how much I say I dont believe in using prayer as a means to an earthly end, wealth wisdome and happiness, I do still very much treat it that way. And really, there are a LOT of verses that support God's desire for us to come to him and ask him for what we feel we need...even what we want...
I dont imagine I will ever stop wrestling with this principle. And I dont feel like I should. I feel like its good that I hold that tension...that wanting to serve him and asking for things along the way but knowing that that isnt the purpose of our relationship.
I try to compare it to my relationship with Dad...If i needed something or wanted something i would ask. Sometimes I would get a no, and there would be some logical reason why, and sometimes he would say sure! Sometimes he would come to me and offer something I hadnt even thought about. That I hadnt even asked for yet.
I know that God is the same way.
But i still wrestled. How come this woman had the perfect life and got everything she ever wanted? This morning it hit me. It hit me after a text message I got from a friend..."I'm expecting a great day."
It's not that this woman got everything she ever wanted. I'm sure that the five examples she spoke about involving things that God had done were cast among thousands of requests she had made that he hadnt yet done. But she rejoiced in what he had. There is something to be said for expecting the best. When we expect the best, when we expect good things, we see it. The more we see goodness and good things the more our heart lightens. The lighter our heart, the more likely we are to attract more good things to ourselves.
In 2003, I was having a hard time. I wanted so much to know that God was nearby and he loved me and wanted to give me good things. I turned on the tv one afternoon and one of those silly preachers said, "let's pray together that God would give us 90 days of rich blessing" I prayed with him and journaled for the next 90 days every blessing I felt God had given me. In retrospect, those 90 days were no different than any other 90 days, but you couldnt have convinced me of that back then. I clearly saw and genuinely believed that God was doing extra work on my behalf..and I saw it everywhere. My faith grew during those 90 days because my perspective changed. I expected greatness, blessing and romancing from God and he did not disappoint. Was it my prayers that antagonized God into showing this to me? No. but it was my prayer that opened my eyes to see that he is ever faithful in providing those things, whether I ask or not.
This lady didnt have a special roll of quarters to put into God's vending machine and buy everything she wanted. God doesnt love her more and give her more than he gives anyone else. He's also not ignored every prayer I have prayed. There are circumstances where God doesnt do what we pray and hope he will. But there is something to the whole "You do not have because you do not ask." And "Ask, believing that you have already recieved it." and "when two or more people agree."
Her talk centered around all of the ways God has used prayer in her life: things that she has prayed for that God did.
I think i ridiculed it because she gave the impression that her life was full and perfect and couldnt get any better. And that ticked me off.
I come from the school of Derek Webbs who combat people's urge to treat God like a vending machine. He's not here for me, I am here for HIM. He created me for himself, not the other way around. Constantly begging him for blessings and wonderful things is corrupt.
Right?
I've been wrestling with it since Monday.
Because no matter how much I say I dont believe in using prayer as a means to an earthly end, wealth wisdome and happiness, I do still very much treat it that way. And really, there are a LOT of verses that support God's desire for us to come to him and ask him for what we feel we need...even what we want...
I dont imagine I will ever stop wrestling with this principle. And I dont feel like I should. I feel like its good that I hold that tension...that wanting to serve him and asking for things along the way but knowing that that isnt the purpose of our relationship.
I try to compare it to my relationship with Dad...If i needed something or wanted something i would ask. Sometimes I would get a no, and there would be some logical reason why, and sometimes he would say sure! Sometimes he would come to me and offer something I hadnt even thought about. That I hadnt even asked for yet.
I know that God is the same way.
But i still wrestled. How come this woman had the perfect life and got everything she ever wanted? This morning it hit me. It hit me after a text message I got from a friend..."I'm expecting a great day."
It's not that this woman got everything she ever wanted. I'm sure that the five examples she spoke about involving things that God had done were cast among thousands of requests she had made that he hadnt yet done. But she rejoiced in what he had. There is something to be said for expecting the best. When we expect the best, when we expect good things, we see it. The more we see goodness and good things the more our heart lightens. The lighter our heart, the more likely we are to attract more good things to ourselves.
In 2003, I was having a hard time. I wanted so much to know that God was nearby and he loved me and wanted to give me good things. I turned on the tv one afternoon and one of those silly preachers said, "let's pray together that God would give us 90 days of rich blessing" I prayed with him and journaled for the next 90 days every blessing I felt God had given me. In retrospect, those 90 days were no different than any other 90 days, but you couldnt have convinced me of that back then. I clearly saw and genuinely believed that God was doing extra work on my behalf..and I saw it everywhere. My faith grew during those 90 days because my perspective changed. I expected greatness, blessing and romancing from God and he did not disappoint. Was it my prayers that antagonized God into showing this to me? No. but it was my prayer that opened my eyes to see that he is ever faithful in providing those things, whether I ask or not.
This lady didnt have a special roll of quarters to put into God's vending machine and buy everything she wanted. God doesnt love her more and give her more than he gives anyone else. He's also not ignored every prayer I have prayed. There are circumstances where God doesnt do what we pray and hope he will. But there is something to the whole "You do not have because you do not ask." And "Ask, believing that you have already recieved it." and "when two or more people agree."
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